March 20, 2003
Hey, Test Monkey! Stop working!!

As much as I tried to align myself with Bary and Caroline (i.e. Buying their friendship), their loyalties were still in question at departure. At least it’s the closest I’ve ever been to having someone on my side ;). But to make matters worse, there I was sticking my foot in my mouth with a barrage of e-mails right before the trip (Some things just never change.).

Everyone arrived on time, and proceeded to rent all the SUVs at the airport, or so it seemed. After an 85 mph drive through snow, our SUV caravan arrived at our cabin. I had a slight delay enjoying the festivities as work had me on my mobile phone in the car (getting pelted by snowballs no less – thanks, Bill). The cabin was awesome. Three levels, a pool table, sauna and an outdoor Jacuzzi…all working! Scott, Bary and Perry (coined Dingle and Dangle) took off for a half-day of skiing at Park City, while others tested out the Jacuzzi, and I, uh, worked. At least we all got together for dinner at Grub Steaks to finish the evening, and encounter our first injury: Bill slamming the car door on his finger. Which was quickly followed by Scott’s smart-ass comment “Bill, if you had asked me before you did that, I would’ve told you not to do that”. Brilliant, Scott.

Thursday we headed to The Canyons for our first full day of skiing, while Val and Caroline went snowshoeing. Great, fresh powder, and best of all minimal picking on Test Monkey! Woohoo! At lunch, we all learned that bananas don’t ski, and I’m sure my jacket will still smell like of bananas on next year’s ski trip! After a couple of pitchers and appetizers at The Smokehouse (where Perry rudely spilled half the beers) we headed home, to the hot tub and the pool table (where Test Monkey did not lose. Did you hear me? I DID NOT LOSE.) After a delay for a broken SUV, due to Laura sitting on the drop gate (Scott’s always saying she needs to lose weight), we hit The Wasatch Brew Pub for dinner. It was a quiet night as we prepared for the long drive to Alta the next morning.

Alta was Alta: always great. And it was snowing! After a day at the spa, Val and Caroline joined us for après ski, for some pitchers, while I sat quietly re-lacing my shoes (thanks Bill and Chris). Then the après ski continued in the hottub back home, with a bottle of JD. There’s nothing like gargling and swallowing in a hot tub (JD, that is). Once the JD was polished off, most of managed to crawl up the stairs to an awesome pasta dinner. And the fun didn’t stop there, as Scott, Laura, Chris, Brenda, and myself headed out to The Monkey Bar (naturally), Cisero’s and finally The Spur (Great find). We even managed to have some strange beeping noise follow us home. Hmm, I’m not sure how they ended up in my cell phone…

Saturday was our mid-trip rest day. Bary and Caroline headed to Park City. Bill, Denise, Perry and Val went dog sledding. Scott, Laura, Chris and Brenda went snowmobiling. And I, of course, worked. Once everyone started returning to the cabin, things started to pick up. As I was being distracted on the balcony, Scott stuffed snow down my back. This lead to a chase through the house, first dowsing Scott with water, then fighting for my cell phone, as Scott held my phone out of my reach, attempting to activate the voice dialing by yelling “Call Elana! Call Elana!” You have no idea how close he was. After the ruckus, we headed for the sleigh ride dinner. The ride up the slope was cold, the entertainment was okay, and the food was great, except maybe for the woman who passed out (I think she had the trout). We finished the night meeting up with Maureen and Jim at The Spur. He seemed to behave well, at least for the moment.

The next day, we headed out to Brighton (along with a little sticker that kept showing up on my snowboard, my helmet, you name it). It was a great day of skiing, which winded down at après ski at Molly Green’s. Then we headed home for Val and Caroline’s amazing chicken dinner. This is also the night that Denise proved to us she really has blonde roots with comments such as “What does beaver taste like?” and “Ducks don’t fly, do they?” Don’t worry Denise, we luv ya! Almost as much as Banger! (Hey, I’m writing this story and I can say whatever I want, you loser East Coasters!!!)

For our last ski day, we headed back to The Canyons. By now, the snow was noticeably melting, but we still got in some good runs. No highlights except maybe that Jim and Maureen didn’t show for lunch, and I got snowed (with wet slushy snow) on the last run by Bill and (Dangle) Perry. Nothing that a nice hottub couldn’t cure! And since it was out last day, we HAD to finish the vodka. Around and around it went, just like the JD a few nights earlier, which we all vividly started remembering (or the after effect at least). Perry barely noticed his bathing suit was pulled down as he stood up in front of Denise. And there he was, dangling. Denise looking…for anything. Nothing. Nada. Zilch. But it set off a frenzy of activity, as Bill ventured into the pond first, followed by Mike and Bary dancing around in ankle-deep pond scum as Scott did a belly flop. It was so shallow that it looked like Scott was making a snow butterfly on his stomach! He was quite the mud man when he got up. And thanks, Scott for washing it all off in our shower. ;) Poor Chris. He was offered $500 to do the same. Oh well!

Once we all cleaned up, we headed to Chimayo’s in Park City to meet Maureen and Jim for dinner. What a relief to have someone else picked on (Jim) for a while. Gosh that guy could talk crap! It was a nice dinner, to wrap up the vacation. And one final foray into Cisero’s for a final drink ended the evening.

The next morning, we got up and packed. No pranks, but we saw remnants of the crazy night before: Footprints in the pond mud, and something that looked strangely like Scott’s scrawny chest print, in 2 inch deep pond water. Nothing like leaving our mark in a creative way!

The west coasters said goodbye to the east coasters, Dingle (Bary) hugged Dangle (Perry), and Test Monkey sighed relief. Until next time…the big 40 for many of us. See ya then!

Posted by mbang at March 20, 2003 11:12 AM